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The Pledge: I Will Not I will not
wash the face of every child in the world with my tongue. I will not
knock over the little neighborhood kids when I greet them. I will not lick pudding or ice cream off the neighbors kids
faces. I will not steal the babys sock from his foot while his Mom is
holding him. I will not take food from those mini-humans who always seem to offer it. I will not eat the cats food, before or after they eat it. I will not throw up in the car or eat other animals poop. I will not use the diaper pail as though it were a cookie jar. I will not insist on the car window being rolled down when its
raining. I will not drop tennis balls in a persons panties when theyre
on the toilet. I will not bark each time I hear a doorbell on the TV. I will not steal Moms underwear and dance all over the back yard
with it. I will not put my head in the refrigerator. I will not play tug-of-war with Dads underwear when hes on
the toilet. I will not suddenly stand straight up when Im lying under the
coffee table. I will not roll my tennis balls or toys under the sofa or behind the
fridge. I will not act as though the garbage collector is stealing our stuff. I will not shake the rainwater off of my fur AFTER entering the house.
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