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YOU KNOW YOU HAVE A BIG DOG WHEN . . .
you tell your dog to sit, and he backs up until he finds a chair.
it takes three people to get your dog on the scale at the vets.
you walk your dog & all know him by name, but you have no idea who THEY are.
you own a dog capable of pulling someone from a porta potty.
you carry a tape measure with you when shopping for a new vehicle.
you keep at least one color-coded drool towel in every room of your
house.
after banishing your husband, the snoring in your bedroom still keeps you awake.
he rests his head on your arm in the car, causing you to make random right turns.
you have to move over when brushing your teeth because your dog wants a drink.
you show a photo of dogs & kids together and the first you point out is your
dog.
stopped at a light, all stare as car rocks because the dog is panting out window.
you go to vacuum your car and most of the fur is up there on the ceiling.
you have had to train your dog not to lick dishes, and the dishes are in the sink.
the pizza delivery people arrange to meet you at the end of the sidewalk.
youre holding him straddled between your legs when the doorbell rings, and
you find yourself quickly transported straight to the front door. And!
your dog stands in your lap, reaching over you to stick his head in drive-through
window at McDonalds and nearly gives the cashier a heart attack when
she turns around to give you your change.
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